Crying Into Her Clothes

As a child I remember my mother in so much desolation, sitting on her bed and tears streaming down her face.

I recall her being unable to move from her bed and reaching for a shirt, the closest object for her to conceal her sobbing.  

As a child I never understood what it was to be in despair or to cry with a broken heart.  As an adult I can now comprehend the hurt.  Suffering from our own battles is not an easy journey.  I yearn to be a mother.  I want to wake each morning and not be washed over by a numbing sense of loss. 

It is time for me to let go and accept that maybe all that I desire is not a part of the plan.  Instead I can only continue to be grateful for the beautiful life that I have.

For now, I sit here and I cry as my mother did.  Into her clothes. 

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9 thoughts on “Crying Into Her Clothes

  1. God always has something great in store! The devil wants things to seem hopeless, but better is on the way…trust Him! Jeremiah 29:11 ” For I know the plans I have for you”—this is the Lord’s declaration—“plans for your welfare, not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” Blessings to you, precious heart!

    • I totally agree with this post, and understand how you feel too. I know that the devil continues to prey on our minds…. He wants to win… But God is in control, sometimes we plan and our plans do not turn into reality…. But God has a bigger plan for us, and sometimes things happen just not when we hope for them. Stay strong beautiful lady. I understand the pain too; ;even this morning I felt like a bit of a mess….. I find it requires work constantly to ensure I don’t get pulled into despair/feeling hopeless but “be anxious in nothing at all, in prayer and petition present your requests to God” 🙂

  2. You probably don’t want to hear it now, but heartbreak is part of what it is to be human. You will grow stronger from this. And there are other pleasures in life than being a mother. All the best to you.

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